Scribed In Light

By Tina Campbell | Scribed In Light

We see the phrase all the time – “I’m fine.”

But what if I told you that behind those two words is a soul worn thin?

A recent post made its way across my screen – a silhouette of a father’s head split in two: One side said “I’m fine’. The other revealed a storm of truth:

• Feelings of failure
• Money worries
• Inadequacy
• The need to be more
• The need to do better
• Anxieties of failure

I had to read it twice.

Not because I didn’t believe it…

But because I realized just how often I’ve overlooked these silent weights in the men I love – my husband, my sons, the father’s of my grandchildren.

The truth beneath the silence

We often hear that men don’t talk much. But the truth? They have been taught not to.

They’ve been taught that vulnerability is weakness. They’ve been taught that they must be the rock. The provider. The protector. The one who never rests, never cracks under pressure – and so they bottle it all up. Every fear, every failure, every doubt – and they hide it under that all-too-familiar phrase, “I’m fine“.

However, underneath, many are quietly unraveling…and no one sees it until the unraveling becomes a breaking.

We live in a new age – but some expectations haven’t changed

Today, households often have two parents working, juggling childcare, finances, meals, emotional support, and everything inbetween.

Yet even now, the expectation still lingers: that the man must bear more, say less, and break never.

But here’s what we must say back to that expectation:

No more.

• Because emotional wellness belongs to men too.
• Because tears and tenderness do not disqualify strength – they prove it.
• Because no one deserves to carry the weight of the world on their own.

To those who never noticed – notice now

If you’ve never stopped to wonder what the men in your life might be silently carrying – this is your nudge. It certainly woke me.

• Ask.
• Check in.
• But don’t just ask once – ask again.
• Ask when they’re quiet.
• Ask when they seem strong.
• Ask when nothing seems wrong.

Because the truth is, many men won’t offer up their plan – they’ll protect you from it (If that doesn’t stir your heart!).

They’ll shoulder burdens in silence to keep peace.

They’ll smile while sinking. (Oh, my heart!)

They’ll stay strong because they think they have to.

So be the safety they didn’t know they had. Not the fixer. Not the pressure. Just the soft place.

• A hand on the back.
• A question without judgment.
• A room where they don’t have to perform to be loved.

Because the quietest ones? They’re often the most overwhelmed.

(Dear God, that is my husband.)

To the men still holding it all – you can set it down now

To every father, husband, grandfather, and son who’s spent a lifetime shouldering invisible burdens – this part is for you.

You’ve been strong for so long that people forgot you’re human too.

You’ve smiled when you were breaking.

You’ve carried fear like it was part of your job description -and still you love without complaint, without demand, without rest.

But hear this with your whole heart:

• You don’t have to carry it all to be loved.
• You don’t have to stay silent to be respected.
• You don’t have to hold it all together to be enough.

Let this be the day you set some of it down.

Let this be the moment you say, “I’m not fine – and that’s okay.”

Your soul deserves space to breathe. Your heart deserves room to speak. You deserve a place where you are not the anchor – but the one finally held.

No one expects perfection here.

Only presence.

Only truth.

Only you – just as you are.

a dedication and gentle blessing

To my husband – the absolute treasure of my life- Alan, the quiet strength behind my every day…

To my adoring sons -the fathers of my grandchildren – who carry love on their backs and rarely lay it down…

To every man reading this who has ever wondered if anyone sees them…

This is for you.

You are not invisible.

You have not missed your moment.

You are not failing.

You are a man worthy of rest. Worthy of love. Worthy of being asked, “How are you – really?”

So… may you feel seen in these words. May you feel safe enough to exhale. May you begin – even if gently – to set down what was never yours to carry alone.

We’ll walk with you – not behind you, not ahead of you, but beside you.

Because healing was never meant to be solitary.

Love, light, and hugs,

Tina Campbell | Scribed In Light — and anchored in grace