Scribed In Light

By Tina Campbell | Scribed in Light

We live in a world where opinions are loud, and truth often gets tangled in tone. In that noise, many have come to fear correction – while others quietly accept behavior that crosses boundaries. In a world that praises being “unbothered,” many of us have swung to extremes – either brushing off everything as hate, or silently tolerating what should never be said.

But there’s a powerful difference between criticism meant to help you grow and disrespect meant to diminish your worth.

And oh, how important it is to learn the difference. Critique is a gift. Disrespect is a toxin. Knowing the difference can change everything.

The Purpose of Critique

Critique when given with the right heart, is an invitation to rise. It’s what shapes artists, sharpens ones character, and ultimately polishes our souls. True critique comes with open hands, not pointed fingers.

It’s a gentle mirror that invites reflection, not condemnation.

You’ll know it by its fruit – because critique, when done in love, becomes one of the greatest gifts for our growth.

But not all feedback is born equal – and not all hearts that offer it are pure.

True critique:

• Speaks with honor and intention.
• Focuses on the action, not your identity.
• Offers clarity, not confusion.
• Feels challenging, not crushing.
• It leaves you thinking, “I can do better,” – rather than questioning, “I am not enough.”

It may sting, but it stings like growth pains, not like wounds. It comes to build, not to break. When critique is embraced, we allow ourselves to become better – not bitter.

The Nature and harm of Disrespect

Disrespect comes disguised as feedback, but its roots are different.

It may:

• Question your value instead of your choices.
• Target your worth, not your behavior.
• Sound like sarcasm, mockery, or belittlement.
• Is rooted in ego, power, authority, or control.
• Leaves you feeling less than, not lifted.
• Be more about the speaker’s ego than your improvement.
• Is often vague, biting, sarcastic, or even shaming.

Where critique builds, disrespect breaks down. Where critique uplifts, disrespect controls. Where critique sharpens and refines, disrespect severs and corrodes. Critique should never be correction with cruelty. It should be a truth that lifts, restores, and repositions with grace – like a skilled gardener pruning not to punish the branch, but to help it bear fruit.

Disrespect on the other hand leaves you doubting your place in the garden altogether. Quite possibly making you feel the need to bolt for an exit. That’s not correction – that’s toxic corrosion.

Why This Matters

Many of us were raised to “be nice,” “stay humble”, or “don’t take things personally.” But humility does not mean being a doormat, and grace doesn’t require enduring degradation. Many of us have missed chances to grow because we mistook loving feedback as rejection. Others have let their light dim because they tolerated disrespect – thinking silence was strength.

But here’s the truth:

• You can be open to growth and still walk away from harm.
• Be kind and still say “That’s not okay.”
• Accept correction and still reject disrespect.
• You can be teachable and still have boundaries.

It is not arrogance – it is wisdom. It’s knowing what voice to let into your soul, and which ones to keep at the gate. Knowing the difference protects your spirit and allows you to flourish.

Let’s get real for a moment.

How many times have we missed the opportunity to grow because we couldn’t handle honest feedback? How many times have we let someone chip away at our spirit because we mistook toxicity for tough love? It’s a mindset that must be dismantled and realigned – because there’s a world of difference between a scalpel and a dagger. While both cut – one is a tool of healing; used with purposeful skill and precision – the other is for harm; driven by destruction.

Closing Reflection

Let us be people who receive correction with grace, yet stand firm when someone speaks beneath our dignity. Growth should never come at the cost of our worth, and no one should have to bleed just to prove they are humble.

Critique, should always call us to higher ground where dignity is preserved and the soul stands taller – not smaller -once the dust settles.

So in a world where voices clash and pride shouts louder than wisdom, may we become people who pause – who listen not just to what is said, but to how it is spoken. Correction, when done with love, is an offering. Disrespect, even when cloaked as honesty, is a wound disguised.

May we learn to discern the voice that builds from the voice that breaks, and in doing so – may we become both braver in recieving truth, and bolder in guarding our God-given worth.

“Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.” – James Baldwin

“If someone corrects you, and you feel offended, then you have an ego problem. If someone disrespects you, and you stay silent, you have a boundary problem.” – Unknown

“Before you speak, let your words pass through three gates: Is it true? Is it necessary? Is it kind?” – Rumi

Discernment is not arrogance. It is alignment in truth. So, I implore – let your soul be taught- but never trampled.

Love, light, and grace…

Tina